glasseskiwi:

5eva:

y’all act like public schools are the worst but i went to a private school for nine months and at one point the boys discovered if you spray your nipple with deodorant for fifteen seconds and flick it then it comes off so they all started doing it and my friend walked into the changing room and got hit in the eye by a flying nipple

HORRIFIED SCREAMS

#I THINK THEY MEANT THE DEODORANT COMES OFF IN A NIPPLE SHAPE NOT THE ACTUAL NIPPLE

LESS HORRIFIED SCREAMS

studip:

my favorite part of concerts is when the band plays a song everyone knows so everyone’s singing along all out of tune but then the singer stops singing and they point the mic at the crowd and u just hear everyone in the crowd singing the words to the music and u see the smiles on the band members’ faces bc they know people care about their music and everyone’s just so happy who cares about anything else

ethiopienne:

the dialogue in this movie was instrumental in shaping my sense of humor as a child, i swear.

misswho221b:

this should’ve been the movie poster

misswho221b:

this should’ve been the movie poster

heart:

DO YOU EVER TYPE ON YOUR PHONE SO MUCH THAT YOUR THUMBS ACHE BUT YOU CANT STOP USING YOUR PHONE SO YOU JUST LET THE PAIN KEEP COMING

notcrazyiswear:

danglingthpider:

notcrazyiswear:

I’ve put together a simple chart that explains the various ways you should and shouldn’t summon a waiter over to your table, and the service you’re likely to receive accordingly.

Because if one more middle aged, obnoxious asshole goes “hey you!” and snaps their fingers at me, I WILL snap said person’s neck.

I waitressed my way through college and one night this guy yells at me “Oi! you with the tits!” and my co-worker Matthew walked up to him and said “yes?”

lapfoxs:

ACCIDENTALLY STEPPING ON A SNAIL

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gameleste:

“what happened to real music”

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White Northern Lights in Finland